This Glass is Officially Half Full

I am officially 20 weeks and the suspense of finding out Baby Ps Gender is killing me! I am not going to tell you the date I find out, because I don’t need everyone I know calling me that whole day, but I will tell you I will reveal to you within 72 hours of our ultrasound. I will also say that it is still a long enough wait that I am sleepless with anticipation. 

So far so good on the baby baking home front. Little Bean has been hyperactive as expected, based on his/her paternal genes. With each appointment. and ultrasound baby P has been flipping and dancing about and the heart-rate is loud and rapidly steady. My gut instinct tells me he is a she, but Hubby is expecting (as all dads do) his little boy. Either way we are happy to know it’s a healthy pregnancy and however this story ends we will be far more “complete” at the end of it.

I have had the pleasure of bidding farewell to the nasty morning sickness that plagued me (as long as I maintain a steady intake of diclectin that is) and food appeals to me once again, though I haven’t had any “Cravings” to claim, because now I am just rehabilitating my steady eating pattern. I have however, been introduced to a whole new pregnancy symptom, Anxiety! I should mention that in my state of dismal illness and the accelerated scent of smell I took a fit regarding our stained, worn-out, stinky carpet so we tore up nearly 800sq/ft of it in our house, which means… now at 5 months pregnant our bedrooms, hallways, and main staircase are down to the subfloor and we have a baby on the way. So…. A whole new freak-out has been upon me; how will we afford this? Where will we find the time to get it done? What kind of flooring do we want now? And poor hubby is left thinking “Why did I listen to this irrational pregnant women in the first place, the carpet was perfectly fine!”  Regardless, this is where we are at, and I am ready to nest… but I have no nursery to nest in, AND it’s another two week wait for the hardwood that we ordered for the floors. I have maintained a steady stream of purging, getting rid of hard cornered coffee tables, and pretty home accents that in the hands of a child morph into dangerous weapons, this is sensible right? I know my husband thinks I have gone sort of crazy, except for the fact that I have sold most of my purged goods to fund some of the baby expenses. (Bonus!)

My plans were to keep this blog updated so I could adequately document the stages of this pregnancy, however, with all this stress (and working 12hr shifts) there has been so much else to think about. Besides all that, up until now I have felt sort of silly connecting with this pregnancy.  What I mean is that I love the idea of talking to and caressing my belly, but for the first four months I just felt like a chubster talking to my rolls (If you have been pregnant before I am sure you know what I mean).  I could have acquired the pregnant waddle in the first stages too (God knows my back pain warranted it) but then I would have left people wondering what I had stuck up my a**, it just isn’t the same without the belly! I have driven by the empty “women with child” parking spot many times, but felt too silly and capable to use it, and I still lift and pull and strain because I don’t want anyone thinking I’m a wuss. It’s only been this month that I have begun to feel ‘connected’ afterall my belly has extended past my breasts, and the faint marks of distress on my skin make it hard to ignore. Hubby has also taken an interest in reading childrens books to my bump, and baby responds with forceful pokes from within my belly.  Oh… and how can I forget the sleepless nights, I was thrilled to begin a month of night shifts in the new year, only to find I can’t sleep during the day either! Not to complain, but this growing sac of fluid in my belly feels like a second bladder and all I want to do is pee, even when my actual bladder is empty. When I lay down on my stomach (as I am used to sleeping) it feels like there is a lump between my hips, and when I side sleep (as recommended) my belly tilts toward the bed and strains my ligaments in an uncomfortable manner. The worst of it all is the restless leg syndrome that I seem to have acquired so even when I am comfortable my leg can’t stop dancing across the bottom of the bed. My overly cuddly dogs have even noticed, as they now avoid my side of the bed altogether.

On the bright side (and with pregnancy its always brighter), I have been scouring buy, sell, and swap sites and have scored the majority of my baby goods for less than $1500, which has so far translated to a savings of over $2500. Gathering everything from vintage/antique pieces to modern day new and unused items, but of course it’s difficult to fully appreciate when they are piled upon each other in our storage room anxiously awaiting the hardwood floors in the nursery. 

So this is where I am at; living in a construction zone, getting bigger by the day, and emotionally unstable (did I mention that part?), but I am wearing a smile, because this little “Bean” is a blessing in the truest form, and we are building a solid foundation in which to raise it… regardless of which gender is revealed on Jan….

Haha, and you thought I was going to tell you!!!!

Much love,

Lesleigh